A Small Thing To Do Each Day For Your Marriage

Before Rosalind and I were married in 1981, the reverend who was to marry us sat us down for some sage advice. I respected him, he was an older guy and had seen a lot in his life.

He said EVERY day the two of us were to spend five minutes together — no interruptions, no kids, no distractions.

It seemed too simple to have a purpose. I thought FIVE MINUTES, that’s nothing! Is it really worth it?

Instead, Rosalind and I started with fifteen minutes. Every day. It rapidly grew to thirty minutes. It has now been this way for thirty-seven years. We never miss a day. Only when one of us is traveling are we unable to do it.

I allowed her to choose the time. She wakes me up at 7am and it starts. No one is around at that hour, even in the days when there were kids. For me it’s perfect because she wakes me up with a cup of coffee (she’s more of a morning person than I am!)

We chat about anything and everything. The kids, our plans, our work, problems, our friends — everything except finances.

In 1981, if someone had asked me how much I would have paid for that piece of advice, I would have said nothing. Today? The advice was priceless. It was part of the keystone of a relationship that started four decades ago. One that I hope never ends.

This piece of wisdom was so simple, and so easy, yet so many couples don’t do it. Putting everything away and just spending time together and communicating — no excuses, no television in the background, no tablets or smartphones in our hands. Make a decision today with your spouse to spend 5 interrupted minutes alone together — it might be the best thing you can do for your marriage and your family.